On the one hand, we should be suspicious of interpretations that are blatantly narcissistic; this way of understanding the book maintains that the entire course of human history has now culminated with us!  An even larger problem, though, is that this approach inevitably has to ignore certain features of the text in order to make its interpretations fit.

Consider, as just one example, an interpretation sometimes given of the “locusts” that emerge from the smoke of the bottomless pit in order to wreak havoc on earth in chapter 9.  The seer describes the appearance of these dread creatures as follows:

On their heads were what looked like crowns of gold; their faces were like human faces, their hair like women’s hair, and their teeth like lions’ teeth; they had scales like iron breastplates, and the noise of their wings was like the noise of many chariots with horses rushing into battle.  They have tails like scorpions, with stingers, and in their tails is their power to harm people… (Rev 9:7-10).ｮLM0ｯｮTW60ｯｮIP4ｯ

According to one futuristic interpretation (by that great scholar of all things biblical – well, not really, Hal Lindsay), these locusts are modern attack helicopters, flying forth through the smoke of battle.  The seer, living many centuries before the advent of modern warfare, had no way of knowing what these machines really were, and so described them as best he could.  They fly like locusts but are shaped like huge scorpions.  The rotors on top appear like crowns; they seem to have human faces, as their pilots peer through their windshields; they are draped with camouflage that from a distance looks like hair; they have fierce teeth painted on their fronts; they are made of steel and so appear to have iron breastplates; the beating of their rotors sounds like chariots rushing to battle; and they have machine guns attached to their tails, like scorpions’ stingers.

What could be more plausible?  The prophet has glimpsed into the future and seen what he could not understand; we, however, living in the age in which his predictions will come to pass, understand them full well.

The problem is that the interpretation simply doesn’t work, because it overlooks some of the most important details of the passage.  Consider, for example, what these “locusts” are actually said to do.  The text is quite emphatic: they are not allowed to harm any grass or trees, but only people; moreover, and most significantly, they are given the power to torture people for five months, but not to kill them (9:4-5).  Those who are attacked by the locusts will long to die, but will not be able to do so (9:6).

Now it may be that the Pentagon has designed a secret weapon, an attack helicopter that can harm people but not trees or vegetation, and that can inflict pain but not kill.  But it seems somewhat unlikely.  These locusts simply can’t be modern instruments of war designed for mass destruction because they are explicitly said to be unable to destroy anything.

The same problems occur with virtually every interpretation of the book that takes its visions as literal descriptions of events that are to transpire in our own imminent future: these approaches simply cannot account for the details of the text — which is to say that they don’t take the text itself seriously enough.  It is probably much better to interpret the text within its own historical context, not as a literal description of the future of the earth but as a metaphorical statement of the ultimate sovereignty of God over a world that is plagued by evil.